Most people are fortunate to live long enough to be called seniors. Although they may not feel that way as they try to navigate the challenges of aging, growing old should be seen as a blessing. Children often worry about their elderly parents and may suggest a move to a retirement community. If the parents agree, how can the children smooth the transition?
Start the Conversation Early
Children should talk to their parents about what they want done in different situations. They should recommend estate planning to ensure the parent’s long-term care needs are met and their assets are protected. Although this care might not be needed anytime soon, everyone should be on the same page when it comes to ensuring the senior’s desires are understood and can be met when the time comes. Learn their preferences and whether options are available in their selected area. Furthermore, discuss warning signs the parent should watch for, which suggest they need additional help and should get moved into assisted living. Be gentle and kind in these discussions, and always get input from the senior rather than make decisions for them.
Allow Them to Process the Idea
Although this conversation should be started before a move is needed, children must give their parents time to process moving to a retirement community. Seniors often don’t like change. They want to remain in their homes where they lived with their children and possibly a spouse. They are comfortable, so moving to independent living might not be appealing. Talk with them about the benefits of doing so and gradually move them toward acceptance without being pushed. A month is a good time to wait after initially opening the conversation.
Research Different Options
Learn about the different options in the area, distinguishing between Residential Care Facilities for the Elderly and large complexes owned by corporations rather than local individuals. Seniors feel more comfortable remaining in familiar surroundings and will probably want to stay close to their homes when they move. Families should make finding the right living arrangement in that area a priority. However, now may be the time for seniors to move closer to loved ones, so keep that option open.
Share This Research With Your Parents
Let your parents know what you have found. They may not know much about assisted living and have the wrong idea about what to expect. Share what you learned about different facilities rather than presenting information about only one. They like having choices. However, limit it to three facilities so they don’t become overwhelmed.
Help Them Downsize
Seniors often have difficulty getting rid of things, especially sentimental items. Children may need to step in and help them downsize. Remind them they don’t have to get rid of everything. They can bring treasured items to the assisted living community because they will have their own space. If help is needed to handle the belongings, turn to a senior move manager or downsizing consultant. They can walk the senior through choosing which items to take and how to handle the items that won’t go with them.
Help the Parent Settle Into the Community
Much like taking a child to college for the first time, children of seniors need to help their loved ones settle in on the first day. Go on a tour with them so they know where everything is, and show them the amenities they can benefit from. Introduce them to staff members and show them where they can get needed help. They will feel better having this information and won’t be as nervous when their children leave.
Plan Regular Visits
Seniors don’t want to move to assisted living and be forgotten by their loved ones. Reassure them this won’t happen and schedule regular visits. While they will make friends within the community, they still want to see their children and grandchildren. Make sure they do.
Moving a parent to assisted living isn’t easy. It reminds them that they are growing older and won’t be here forever. Use these tips to help make the transition smoother and ask for help when needed. This transition is good for most seniors, as they have support and companionship. They can focus on things they love and leave household tasks to others, giving them the highest quality of life.